How to tell if you're a ricer
Thread Starter
Registered User
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 239
From: Vancouver, BC
How to tell if you're a ricer
Saw this at a Z site somewhere. Thought I might share it! quite amusing to non-ricers anyway I assume! 
1) You have more wings than a bucket of chicken!!!!
2) Your paint reflects more light than a road sign!!!
3) If you have more stickers than a mid 70's Trans-Am.
4) If you have a bigger exhaust than a semi.
5) If your camber is sooo bad only part of the tire that gets wear is the sidewall.
6) When you go by people start looking for killer bees.
7) If you rev your car to the limiter every time you are at a stop light or just stopped.
8) When your exhaust is made from a company called Folgers.
9) When you think your stickers give you an extra advantage in horsepower.
10) If your next mod involves neon lights.
11) If your "cold air intake" is located in the engine bay sucking in hot air.
12) If you have damage to your body kit because of your 20" rims.
13) You own a 350z and visit the 350z section of zcar.com to get good performance parts opinions.
14) Your mom used to drive you and your siblings to school in your "performance car."
15) You can't corner over 20 mph because your rims will scrub.
16) You take out the rear seat to save weight, then add 100 lbs of stereo equipment.
17) You have a video game system in your car.
19) You have decals on your car in a foreign language and you have no idea what they say.
20) Librarians look at your rear spoiler in envy.
21) Your muffler has twice as many cubic inches as your engine!
22) You think horsepower is more important than torque.
23) You see something at NOPI, have no idea what it is, yet you must have it, because doodah has one.
24) When you have a rollcage installed in your 17 second Civic.
25) When you lower the rear of your car with a 250 lb wing.
26) When you have 3 boost gauges installed on the A pillar for your stock 0.5 litre sewing machine motor.
27) When you slap type R badges all over your ride and think its quicker.
28) When you have a 3/4 inch exhaust with an 8 in can in the back.
29) When your car is actually higher than stock ride height because of its 22 in rims.
30) When you think your ride is faster because you have green lights under your car.
31) If your body kit has more cracks than a plumber *** crack.
33) Whenever a Z guy mentions the name "Datsun" you think pickup truck.
39) If twenty years from now, you look at pics of the cars you have present day and ask yourself "WTF was I thinking!"
40) If you take this too seriously............
41) Your tach is bigger than your head.
42) Your shift light can blind somebody.
43) You have a shift light on a vehicle with an automatic transmission.
44) You have more fog/driving lights than most Rally Racers
45) You have 1 Wiper because its "cool"
46) You always talk of the turbo conversion but it never seems to happen.
48) You don't know the difference between understeer and oversteer.
50) Your " performance" car is the cheapest car the manufacturer sells.
51) You have a big APC sticker on your car, anywhere on your car. And don't forget about the site www.anti-rice.com.
53) If your interior lighting glow sticks are brighter than your headlights.
57) If your indiglo gauges blind the car behind you.
58) If you mount a double-deck spoiler on top of a factory spoiler.
60) Two wings are better than one
62)
a. If you take what they said on Fast & Furious as gospel.
b. All of your friends drive Hondas and they consider a Civic a high performance car.
c. If you think that VTEC means that your engine is unbeatable in the HP dept
1) You have more wings than a bucket of chicken!!!!
2) Your paint reflects more light than a road sign!!!
3) If you have more stickers than a mid 70's Trans-Am.
4) If you have a bigger exhaust than a semi.
5) If your camber is sooo bad only part of the tire that gets wear is the sidewall.
6) When you go by people start looking for killer bees.
7) If you rev your car to the limiter every time you are at a stop light or just stopped.
8) When your exhaust is made from a company called Folgers.
9) When you think your stickers give you an extra advantage in horsepower.
10) If your next mod involves neon lights.
11) If your "cold air intake" is located in the engine bay sucking in hot air.
12) If you have damage to your body kit because of your 20" rims.
13) You own a 350z and visit the 350z section of zcar.com to get good performance parts opinions.
14) Your mom used to drive you and your siblings to school in your "performance car."
15) You can't corner over 20 mph because your rims will scrub.
16) You take out the rear seat to save weight, then add 100 lbs of stereo equipment.
17) You have a video game system in your car.
19) You have decals on your car in a foreign language and you have no idea what they say.
20) Librarians look at your rear spoiler in envy.
21) Your muffler has twice as many cubic inches as your engine!
22) You think horsepower is more important than torque.
23) You see something at NOPI, have no idea what it is, yet you must have it, because doodah has one.
24) When you have a rollcage installed in your 17 second Civic.
25) When you lower the rear of your car with a 250 lb wing.
26) When you have 3 boost gauges installed on the A pillar for your stock 0.5 litre sewing machine motor.
27) When you slap type R badges all over your ride and think its quicker.
28) When you have a 3/4 inch exhaust with an 8 in can in the back.
29) When your car is actually higher than stock ride height because of its 22 in rims.
30) When you think your ride is faster because you have green lights under your car.
31) If your body kit has more cracks than a plumber *** crack.
33) Whenever a Z guy mentions the name "Datsun" you think pickup truck.
39) If twenty years from now, you look at pics of the cars you have present day and ask yourself "WTF was I thinking!"
40) If you take this too seriously............
41) Your tach is bigger than your head.
42) Your shift light can blind somebody.
43) You have a shift light on a vehicle with an automatic transmission.
44) You have more fog/driving lights than most Rally Racers
45) You have 1 Wiper because its "cool"
46) You always talk of the turbo conversion but it never seems to happen.
48) You don't know the difference between understeer and oversteer.
50) Your " performance" car is the cheapest car the manufacturer sells.
51) You have a big APC sticker on your car, anywhere on your car. And don't forget about the site www.anti-rice.com.
53) If your interior lighting glow sticks are brighter than your headlights.
57) If your indiglo gauges blind the car behind you.
58) If you mount a double-deck spoiler on top of a factory spoiler.
60) Two wings are better than one
62)
a. If you take what they said on Fast & Furious as gospel.
b. All of your friends drive Hondas and they consider a Civic a high performance car.
c. If you think that VTEC means that your engine is unbeatable in the HP dept
Doesn't post much...
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 3,617
From: Escondido (San Diego) California
If your car produces more downforce than thrust... You might be a ricer.
If your car is lowered so far that you can't enter or exit your driveway with a full tank of gas... You might be a ricer
If your rear brake DRUMS are painted red, blue, yellow... or body color... You might be a ricer
If the little blue lights on your hood where the washer nozzles used to be constantly make people in front of you pull over because they think it's a motorcycle cop... You might be a ricer
If you've spent more money on your car at Pep Boy's than the car cost in the first place... You might be a ricer
If your car is lowered so far that you can't enter or exit your driveway with a full tank of gas... You might be a ricer
If your rear brake DRUMS are painted red, blue, yellow... or body color... You might be a ricer
If the little blue lights on your hood where the washer nozzles used to be constantly make people in front of you pull over because they think it's a motorcycle cop... You might be a ricer
If you've spent more money on your car at Pep Boy's than the car cost in the first place... You might be a ricer
Registered User
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 242
From: Island Lake Illinios
Once again BJ, I like your style!
If your AERO kit has any resemblence to a MAC TRUCK... yoouuu, might be ricer.
If you go to a family gathering looking for a wife... Yooouuuu, might be a redneck.
Sorry guys, I love Jeff Foxworthy!
If your AERO kit has any resemblence to a MAC TRUCK... yoouuu, might be ricer.
If you go to a family gathering looking for a wife... Yooouuuu, might be a redneck.
Sorry guys, I love Jeff Foxworthy!
Registered User
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 5,485
From: Temecula, CA
Hey , my stickers add horsepower. But I'm not a ricer cause my muffler was made my Maxwell House, no Folgers. But I'm saving for the upgrade and my 14th wing. I just blew all my money on my flashing valve stems and Powered by Honda sticker(that was before I realized I drove a Nissan). Hopefully by next year I'll have my 29" rims, YEAH BABY, BLING BLING .
PS, if anyone takes this serious, I wish you death
.PS, if anyone takes this serious, I wish you death
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